My bike was jacked ~5 months ago. I filed a police report. I provided a full description of the bike. Yellow harlequin bar tape wrap, yellow fenders – kinda hard to miss. Filed away and forgotten.
Today, walking home, I come across my fucking bike. Nothing has been swapped out, and it’s got a cheap-ass Kryptonite combo cable lock on it.
At the time I have no way of removing the lock, nor do I have my lock with me. But I had already filed the report, so I call the police to see if they’ll be able to unlock it. I know, dumb plan.
Cop eventually shows up, gets the info from the report I’d previously filed. Did I report the serial number? Fuck no. I never wrote it down. Yeah, I should have, but it’s my fucking bike, I filed a full report, and it’s all fucking black and yellow and exactly matches the description in the report I already filed. Long and short, she won’t help me and decides to leave a note asking the “owner” to call the police. She explains that she believes it’s my bike, as if that makes things less ridiculous. I have to wait for her to leave just so I can take my fucking wheel off.
What the motherfucking fuck? What’s the point of the fucking police report if the fucking police won’t use it? More importantly, what the fuck was I thinking ever involving them at all?
Anyway, should I feel at all bad (in case some sucker bought the bike thinking it was square) or concerned for my legal status by cutting the lock? I went back and overlocked it until I can get my hands on a hacksaw (that should do it on a braided cable, yah? it’s a cheesy $15 model), but I could also just leave it overlocked to see if someone comes and takes their lock back. Or maybe I’ll just take all my components back (the frame isn’t worth shit) and if anyone complains I’ll just tell them to call the cops since the components don’t have fucking serial numbers, so there’s no way anyone owns them.
The cop wasn’t even hot.