[quote]25 January 2007
While browsing through some bike blogs, I found what I thought was my dream come true. I vaguely recall a gasp of air followed by quivering with anticipation when I saw the link and sample photos. Could it be real? Had the gods truly blessed me so?
It was fixie porn. The blog had a link to another site where some guys who ride fixed gear bikes would be shown straddling their mounts in nothing but their underpants, at least based on the few samples on view. I wasted no time in clicking the link, but alas, the site was long gone.
Fixie Porn
It’s no secret that I have a thing for guys on bikes, and the types who ride “fixies” are a special breed — in their own minds, at least. Fixies are the bitchin’ Camaros of the bike world, the pimped out ride for boys who are trying hard to be cool. Which is so cute. And that’s why seeing bike messenger wannabes posing in their saggy undies, trying to look all ironically sexy actually is quite attractive, though probably not for the reasons they were hoping for.
I mean, look at that guy’s face; you can see the insecurity. He’s dead fucking serious about looking cool. But he’s wearing pink underpants. On the other hand, he is actually hot, and he’s in nothing but pink undies. It all adds up to hunky, healthy, adorable, and yet still approachable. What’s not to love?
Fixie Porn Reborn
Aggressive googling has uncovered numerous references to the original location of the site, thefge.com, a fixed-gear forum, which is now defunct. So I tried digging it up in the Wayback Machine, but the pictures are no longer archived. Oh, well.
However, forensic reconstruction has enabled me to rejoin the blogged photos with their archived profiles. The thumbnails below are linked to images on my Flickr account.
Tim from Minneapolis
“This is Tim from Minneapolis. He is our first fixed gear enthusiass model. Tim is riding a 54cm Riggio track frame from Columbus Cromor, 151bcd campy pista cranks, 36 hole IRO hubs laced 3 cross to Mavic Open4cd rims (15 front, 14/15 rear), Italian thread miche bottom bracket,and a Cinelli stem. Her name is Isabella. Normally 48×18 gearing; 48×15 when she wears her nice wheels. He is wearing “Joe Boxer” limited edition hearts print, which match his frame and has grown quite a beard. Tim insisted on including his email so here it is ladies, [ x ] Thanks Tim!”
William from L.A.
“This is William from L.A. He is pictured with some of his bikes. The orange one is his main ride he uses to commute to work and general riding. It’s a motobecane champion team track bike from the 70’s with a brooks saddle and a mix of track parts, nothing that amazing. The bianchi in the background has a chrome fork and rear triangle and a full pantographed campagnolo record track group with old phil wood chp track pedals. Hot damn! the bike he is on is a pink casati gold line racing track bike. It has a full suntour superbe pro track group, with suntour superbe pro hubs built up to campy zonda/shamal deep aluminum 16 hole rims, cinelli volare slx saddle and a cute little pink bow. Hot damn again! He also has a 3 rensho and a cyclops track bike, like he didn’t have enough hot bikes. He wants to have all the colors of jordan almonds in his bikes, these three are pretty close to being a full set. He also builds lugged track bikes in his kitchen. William is a nurse in one of the intensive care units at ucla hospital. I’m sure all the girls will be disappointed to hear him say he has a wonderful girlfriend but if you girls would like to torture yourselves a litte more you can take a look at his site [ x ] Thanks William!”
Travis from Switzerland
“This is Travis from Switzerland again. His old frame cracked, so here’s an update of the new bike. He is riding a soma frame with a custom track fork. He’s rolling’ on the same old Czech hubs and Rigida rims, driven with Gipiemme cranks, which is all steered by a Nitto stem and drops. He cut off most of his hair because it just got too damn hot. I’m pretty sure he’s still available and he can be reached at [ x ] Thanks Travis!”
[/quote]
All of you guys are a bunch of fucking [color=#FF80FF]faggets[/color].
